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Those with true material foundation don't actually need bride price.
Bride price is a barrier set for ordinary people.
You need to discuss bride price only if you don't have money.
Once you have money, you wouldn't dare ask for too much bride price either—it's just a token gesture.
I remember when I was first planning to get married, I also talked about bride price. Back in my hometown, the atmosphere wasn't very good at the time, and the demands were starting to escalate.
But I bought my car and house myself. When you have a foundation, the other party won't even see bride price as an issue.
When bride price came up in negotiations, my dad thought my marriage might not work out. (Actually, my parents didn't know whether I had money or not. Based on both the old customs and current trends back then, it definitely wouldn't have worked.)
I had already made a decision in my mind—if I needed my parents' money 💰 to get married, I'd rather not do it. I basically didn't let my parents pay a single cent for my wedding; it was all my own money. 💰
Back in 2016,
if I needed my parents to contribute money, bride price would've been at least 200,000 ➕ (plus the standard for buying a house and car would be at least 1 million to start).
But in the end, I gave just 50,000 as bride price symbolically.
Because when you have the ability yourself, other thresholds aren't really thresholds at all.
Based on the bride price standards back then, which were tens of thousands of yuan, I could've afforded it. (I just said one thing: my brother received 50,000 in bride price from my parents when he got married, so I did the same.) Actually, all the money 💰 for my wedding came from myself.
Looking back now, the situation is the same today—people around me with real capability basically don't worry about bride price thresholds (you can ignore them, but without this foundation, the bride price threshold becomes a real threshold).
I have the right to negotiate with you on terms; it's not whatever you want to discuss.
Actually, over a decade ago (2015), on my girlfriend's birthday, I transferred a 52,000 yuan red envelope 🧧 to her once. (Birthday gift) I didn't even think about marriage back then—it was just that pure feeling of liking someone, being willing to spend money on them.
No bride price gifts at all; I just bought a ring 💍.
But if you directly bring up bride price amounts, then I'll judge whether your attitude and taste are worth it.
Having aligned values is very important.
With economic foundation, all other attached conditions can be removed. Once you lack this economic base, every single threshold becomes something you need to tackle item by item.
From observing the past decade, everyone who got married by using their parents' life savings ended up getting divorced.